Lean On Myself

I am constantly being pushed and shoved to go this way and that way. For so many years I have allowed people to influence my decisions. Only at the end when I had no one by my side, just because I did not listen to them, I realize that there was one person I can trust, MYSELF.

In the middle of my year at Brooks High I constantly got good grades until I met this boy. But this boy wasn't just any boy; this was Chance Brown. He was a tall and very handsome boy. Chance was in the 11Th grade at the time and I was in the 10Th. When this boy came around me I felt completely weak inside. Chance had been a bad boy for the longest and I liked it.

" Hey Eternity, wanna come over to my house tonight." I thought, " Oh my God, the most gorgeous man I've met all my life has just invited me to his house." I quickly responded "Yes I would love to." He walked me home and kissed me gently on my lips. My mind went completely blank. I ran into the house and up to my room. I had to find the best outfit ever.

I went to my closet and pulled out the tightest pants and my favorite hot pink V-neck shirt. If you got it flaunt it, right. I asked my mother if I could go over Shawnna's house for a slumber party knowing that I was going with Chance. I threw on a couple of jewelry from my mom's jewelry box. She's not home plus this kind of diamonds are not for a nursing uniform.

I put on my mini jean jacket and ran on out the door. On the way to Chance's house my heart was racing like crazy. I knocked on the door and opening the door was Chance looking all sexy and good. He invited me in to watch a movie and in seconds he was all over me.

" Chance, please stop, I'm not really ready for all this," I said in a soft voice. He stopped and looked at me real hard and just kept going. I pushed him off and fixed my shirt which he tried to take off.

" I thought you were a woman not a girl," he said and I felt like he was staring through my soul. I headed for the door and he hurt me by grabbing my wrist.

" Chance let me go please," I begged.

" Look you ain't leaving 'til I get what I want" said Chance with fire in his eyes. I managed to escape and I kicked him between his legs and ran out. I knew I was wrong and could never tell anyone about what happened 'til this day. I have kept this terrible secret and this my first time discussing it.